The Penis Detector & Smelly Astronaut Update!
by A Real Person on June 23, 2010
Chat Roulette Developing Penis Detector
Bad news guys – Chat Roulette is developing a Penis-Recognition Algorithm. This new addition will skip over all the creeps with their wangs out or anyone with phallic features, I guess. Sorry penis-faces, life just got a little bit harder. Shawn Fanning, creator of Napster will be consulting on this project. Wow, I forgot he existed. I just figured Steve Jobs had him captured and castrated and now uses him as his crippled manservant.
But seriously, apart from the pervs, are there still people using Chat Roulette for anything other than just novelty’s sake? Give it up algorithm developers – if it’s an Internet thing, people are going to use it to have sex anonymously or to broadcast their ugly genitalia.
And btw, I’m pretty sure that the Batman/Obama mask guys segued organically into some unspeakably filthy cybersex.
[via Popular Science]
Real life Science Nerdist Moments
Sometimes I forget how cool my job really is and I have to remind myself that I’m surrounded by some pretty awesome stuff. Here are a few insights into working in a laboratory.
- I spent most of yesterday re-organizing our human freezer (I know), which meant I got to be totally surrounded by dry ice sublimation for a few hours…and yes, I did hum the Doctor Who theme song in my head the entire time.
- The fact that I get to use an iris scanner. Boom. I can feel like James Bond whenever I want.
- A colleague came rushing into our weekly lab meeting and said, “Sorry I’m late. We had a little laser problem.”
- I found this in one of our cabinets and felt the need to share it – it’s my version of a cute cat video.
Mars500 Simulator Update!
It’s day 21 for our favorite smelly astronauts! The crew has posted a guided video tour of their Martian Mancave which, I gotta say, doesn’t look half as bad as I imagined. A virtual reality computer, a gym, Nintendo Wii, and Guitar Hero (Guitar Hero?! God dammit! Why don’t they have a live webcam??). They’ve also adorabley decorated their walls like 12 year olds with pictures of their friends and family, glow in the dark stars, and pony stickers. And while they don’t have a live webcam feed, they are posting a pretty regular video diary with little snippets about what they’re up to and how they are doing (fingers crossed for Real World-like confessionals about how they secretly hate each other). Also, a glimpse into their rooms in the 2nd video seems to reveal that they stole their bedspreads from pre-adolescent girls. One has huge cherries all over it and another crewmember has one with pink roses. Nice. Well, wave bye-bye to the chance that this job will ever get you guys laid. De-sexualization: complete! I encourage all of you to watch their video diaries, shoot them an email, and follow crewmember Diego Urbina on Twitter as he descends into madness.
[via Popular Science]
*Update – I sent him a tweet telling him I’m writing about their mission. I hope he’s not offended by my jokes about his impending swamp ass.
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