So…uh…furries are for realsies, as it turns out. They’re also gay for French men and use carbonated fruit juice for aftershave. I am not being funny. These are all legitimate—if not somewhat terrifying—facts, as demonstrated irreparably by the above video.

I want so badly to joke about this but I’m finding it very difficult to uncurl myself from the fetal position in order to make with the witticisms.

So warm… So safe…

I am a Zen little pillbug, floating in a happy place where there is no third and infinitely more disturbing connotation for ‘cougar’.

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