3 Awesome Geek Toys That Won’t Get You Laid
by A Real Person on June 4, 2010
It’s not easy picking up chicks when you’re a geek. Sure, “wanna hold my lightsaber?” might sound like a clever pick-up line at a bar, but when she sees that you were actually talking about the Force FX replica of Luke’s green lightsaber mounted on your wall, she’ll be out of there faster than an easily startled Tusken Raider. And she won’t be back. Definitely not in greater numbers, anyway. These loosely-applicable Star Wars jokes workin’ for ya? Alright, moving on.
Here are three new gadgets/toys/mods from around teh internetz that are totally awesome and will totally not help you win over that cute girl/guy you know.
1.) Real Live Mario Karts!
Tired of pwning your friends on the virtual racetrack? Well, now you can make them feel inferior IRL with these RC Mario Karts. You can even get power-ups that show up on your controller, which you can fire at other karts and cause them to rumble and slow down. Try to control your urges to take your pet turtle and wing it at your friend’s head while you’re racing, though.
2.) Diversitile’s Iron Man Nikes
Seriously. Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t want these. They glow, man. They freakin’ glow. They also come in a War Machine variety, in case red and gold aren’t your colors.
3.) Augmented Reality Tattoo
Ooh, so close. Tattoo’s are great for getting the girls who like the bad boy, but not the bad boy who geeks out about augmented reality. Anyway, the tattoo itself is a simple barcode which, when viewed by a camera, will display a three-dimensional and animated image…in this case, a flying dragon. I’m assuming you can create the image you want, in which case I would like a dancing Rick Astley, please. Thank you.