2. Fat prejudice is the one prejudice still acceptable in this country. It’s so pervasive, most people don’t even notice it. Kudos for nailing that judge.

3. When you run your billion-dollar social networking phenomenon, can I have a job?

And the thing that’s driving me nuts is that there are SO MANY OTHER THINGS you could say about him that would be funnier and more clever, but you went for the obvious joke, totally negating your earlier point. Awwww shit!

Actually, calling someone gay isn’t an insult. Calling someone fat can never really sound like a compliment.

Kra-KROW (Poland)

To be fair, you just called the gay dude gay. Oh snap!

…and I can’t believe I kind of just defended a Dancing With The Stars judge. I feel dirty now.

I remember it was my 2nd or 3rd term and I was taking Video Editing in the Mac lab, and for many it was our first time in front of a Mac. I had used them before, but it was years back. We needed to burn something onto a disc at one point and half the class couldn’t figure out how to open the CD-Rom drive. The face of the tower was completely smooth. No buttons except for power and reset. You couldn’t pry the drive open. I remembered that in prior versions of Macs you had to go the dropdown menu to Open the drive, or that you could drag your disc to the trash and it would eject it. But there was no option in the dropdown menu and no disc to trash. It was infuriating and finally someone raised their hand and meekly asked “How do you open the CD-Rom Drive!?”. A wave of relief passed over the other half of the class that felt that it was entirely too stupid a question to ask. The teacher, a rabid Mac enthusiast, sighed and pointed out that on the keyboard there was a button on the top right that would open and close the drive.

ON THE KEYBOARD! I had to chuckle and remembered why I never dealt with Macs. They’re so ridiculous. It seems like they care more about being sleek and stylish than having common sense functionality. For those towers, you had to have a very specific keyboard. If it breaks you can’t just plug in some cheap replacement. You HAVE to get Apple’s version with the CD-Rom button, otherwise your drive is utterly useless. Same thing for that Shuffle. Don’t like the headphones that came with it? Happen to have a pair of quality headphones that you paid over $100 for? Too bad you can’t change songs unless you use the Apple earbuds! It’s completely ridiculous, and it’s stuff like this that keeps me from every buying anything Apple. They’re so anti-3rd Party components that there’s never been a point for me to bother with them.

Heck, I don’t even know if it this is 100% true, but I heard from my roommate that they’re now putting little microchips in the headphones for iPods that are required for the player to feed sound to them. If you use headphones that aren’t Apple authorized and don’t have said chip in them, then your player is useless. I know! It sounds completely absurd and unbelievable. And yet it completely falls in line with the way Apple markets their products. So I wouldn’t be too surprised if it were true.

I’m not a Mac hater. I can use em, albeit not as fluently as a Windows PC. I’ve just never seen the point. Why be tied entirely to one company, when you can shop around?

Two married friends are out drinking…
One says to the other: “I can never sneak into the house after I’ve been drinking. I’ve tried everything. I turn the headlights off before I go up the drive. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off and creep upstairs. I get undressed in the bathroom. I do everything, but then my wife still wakes up and yells at me for staying out late.”

His friend replies: “Do what I do. I screech into the driveway, slam the front door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, slap my wife’s bottom and say, “How about a blow job?” She always pretends she’s asleep.”

I thought it was funny, have a great day. It’s hard to love St. Patricks Day when you don’t drink, but hell with it, I still love it.

Michael